There was a point just after my last update post that I feared I had allowed optimism to creep in to life too soon but in the end everything worked out okay.
Despite only getting paid for my first week of work in September I managed to make that money go all the way through until October pay day. I had calculated how much could be given to my partner before his October pay day and with walking to work everyday it all went fine and he did not need to transfer me any back across. Getting a full months pay at the end of October felt pretty strange (good but strange) but it felt so good to have complete freedom all of a sudden.
We met with a few friends just after my last update and we all agreed to get some fresh store bought pizzas and drink in rather than going out for something to eat and umming and ahhing about where to go.
I got the multi-tasking, all singing and all dancing 3-in-1 waffle maker. Since it came into my life I have enjoyed toasted sandwiches and waffles a few too many times but have not found a use of the panini plate (in my head it can be used for other things but not sure what). Suddenly lunches, dinners and desserts are a lot more exciting though my partner, who has to do the washing up of the plates and deal with the mess made, almost certainly disagrees.
But finding a balance has proved tough. What is this money thing I have in my account and what do I spend it on? In the last couple of weeks I have promised myself to save it up and clear my overdraft before buying any big purchases (however much a laptop and camera call my name) and instead to just purchase essentials and things for Christmas.
Speaking of Christmas I have made the smallest of starts but do have a rough list of purchases for when I get paid next but the reality of it only being just over a month away is a little daunting. I usually like to have everything organised by now so do feel a little out of my depth.
College has become more tolerable now I have work to do and can access it from home to allow me to do work as and when it suits me rather than in a couple of hours at my least productive point of the week. Finally being enrolled after a month also means I can log onto the college computers with ease and it is something that until now was a bane of my life.
I’ve done a social media short course at Goldsmiths University for work and found it really useful. Not only did I learn different skills for work and how to approach social media professionally and personally but I also discovered a lot about my own identity and mindset. This has allowed me to focus on creating a social media strategy at work to create better and more effective content.
Doing a huge food shop felt great but this month has lacked a lot of excitement. We nipped out for some food in Wetherspoons after I finished work one Sunday and we have had some takeaway but other than that treating ourself has been fairly limited.
With Christmas coming and an overdraft to eliminate spending will still be fairly limited. My partner has agreed to get me a new pair of Dr Marten’s after my four year old ones cracked in spectacular style a couple of days ago (until I get new ones I will be avoiding puddles like the plague). Other than shoes there is really little else I want or need, or at least things that I can justify, I just need to segment my money better and be a bit stricter on myself instead of spending it on absolute rubbish.
But even if I did have the money to spend I really feel like I do not have the time or the energy to enjoy anything. I feel like this has to be something other people experience? I work five days a week, go to college and do college work one day a week and then have another day to do chores and get stuff done. I am just so exhausted all of the time that whenever I get in from work or college all I can do is cook and then need to curl up in bed and sleep. In honesty, if you’ve followed my blog for a while, I am struggling to not fall back to my old self – I am unable to create a balance and burnout is fast approaching. Tips for getting stuff done but having a balance without burnout would be seriously appreciated.
Until next time, where hopefully my posts will be less scattered as my brain forms more logical patterns, take care. Now just to make it through to pay day next week.